29 December 2007

Prevarications R Us: The Meme

I have been tagged by the delectable DCup to enunciate seven lies. Whilst this goes against everything I hold sacred, I feel that it is my duty as a gentleman to come up with something....

I suppose I could start with the awful truth of the deception I have been perpetrating on the InterWebs for the last ten months. Despite the image in my profile picture, I am, in fact, a 14 year-old girl who lives in a split-level pinstripe yurt on the outskirts of Ulan Bator.

I am currently working as a covert agent of MI6, the British Intelligence Agency, gathering data on the shrinking herds of wild horses that populate the Steppes. I would tell you why this data is important, but then I would have to kill you.

Before taking on this undercover job, I was an outsourcing officer for a major multinational corporation that specializes in oil field equipment. I can't tell you which one, cause Uncle Dick made me sign a non-disclosure agreement. In that job, I had contact with many interesting people all over the world, and told them that my company had only their best interests - and the interests of Freedom® - at heart. I loved seeing the looks on their faces when the home office screwed them over.

Before that I was a student at B. Hussein Obama Madrassah and Dry Cleaning, where I majored in Fundamental Chemistry. I am ever so grateful to the school's namesake for getting me a student visa... thanks, Barry!

In my spare time I train Blackwater Spec. Ops. personnel in waterboarding techniques and do fact-checking for Jonah Goldberg.

That's about all there is to know about me... Oh!, except for my real name:

Condoleeza Dubyina Rumsfeld

Well, now it's time to tag others... I pick:

TheCunningRunt (my snowbound Siamese Cousin)
Jennifer (who's languishing in dialup world)
konagod (who celebrated a blog milestone today)
Christina (my newest blogphriend)
Space Cowboy (who never gets tagged for anything)

No comments: